As parents, we know that a few goodies here and there for our kids isn’t going to ruin them for life. However, there are some things that we can do as parents that will make “ruining” them inevitable.

1. No discipline at all- Some parents have a fear of being perceived as “mean” by their children and this, in turn, causes them to cut out discipline  all together, even when it is necessary. Children need and appreciate boundaries and limits. Without discipline, they can lose focus on the difference between good and bad behavior.

2. Arguing in front of kids- When kids see you and your spouse calling each other bad names or yelling and screaming, they are more likely to to lash out or  use coping mechanisms that may lead to trouble such as drugs or negative relationships.

3. Setting a bad example- Using bad language, lying, being mean to your friends or family members are all things that your kids will see. Children have a tendency to mimic the behavior of their parents, be it positive or negative. You are their first example of acceptable behavior, so if you set a bad example, that is exactly what you can expect to get in return.

4. Giving in- If you have taken away something from your child or said “no” to something that your child wants, it is very important to stand your ground and stay consistent. Being firm and letting your child know that you mean business is the best  and fastest way to correct negative behavior.

5. Always taking their side- Whether it’s a fight with a teacher or another child, you never admit that your child may be to blame. Some parents believe that their child can do no wrong and is always the victim of being mistreated by others. It is imperative that kids understand that they are not above everyone else, especially adults and they must follow rules and fall into place when appropriate.

What are some ways that you think kids can be “ruined?”

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  1. Another way a child can be ruined is by parents permitting certain behaviors just because “they’re too young to know”. For example, there was a little boy on the playground hitting other children. His mom just said, “He doesn’t know any better.” What? I know 2-year-olds who very much understand such things.

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